PUT ON YOUR BIG KID PANTS AND DEAL WITH IT!!!!!

So.Fscking.Tired.Of.Whiney.Employees.That.Can't.Or.Won't.Manage.Their.Own.Life.

"Sorry - no sleep last night - can't come in."
"Sorry - stuck on the toilet - can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."
"Sorry - BLAH BLAH BLAH WORDS -can't come in."

OK - who the Hell manages YOUR life & YOUR health? You want the short answer? YOU!!!!!!
YOU!!!!!!
YOU!!!!!!
YOU!!!!!!
YOU!!!!!!


DO YOU FRACKING GET IT YET???????

Go The Hell To Bed.
Eat The Right Foods.
Get The Proper Exercise.

Do you work for me? If so, know this:
I am at least 13 years older than you.
I Exercise 3X more than you - and I can prove it.
I eat better than you do - and I can prove it.
I can out-drink your ass any day - and I can prove it.
At the end of the year I will sacrifice 5+ sick days while you will be in the red - and I can prove it.
The last time I took unscheduled time off was because I found my Mom DEAD in her condo - and I can prove it.



FRACKING PUT ON YOUR BIG KID PANTS AND FRACKING GET THE FRACK INTO WORK. DO YOU HEAR ME NOW??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Sale's professionals should have no technology more advanced than an Etch-a-Sketch

And even that might be a bit much.

I cannot tell you how many hours I have spent on the clock and off the clock repairing & cleaning the laptops of sales "professionals." It seems that regardless of teh myriad of warnigs the I.T. world sends out they simply seem hell-bent on following the instructions of every e-mail they get even if the DON'T have an account at Bank of America.

Why? Why do they do this? Seriously, I have seen NO other classificiation of professional with such a high rate of laptop destruction. I just finished cleaning the laptop of a real estate agent. It took not two, not three but SIX individual tools to eradicate all of the virii, backdoors & browser hijacks on the poor thing. It had more trojans in it than a college dorm in the 80s!

Oh, and the very first time I saw a cell phone hijacked? Yep - sales geek.

Hang The Sum'Bitch!

"It's cruel! Inhumane! No court has the right to decide if a person deserves to live or die!" So are the arguments made by the bleeding hearts to end the death penalty. Well, if you are on that side of the fence, may I present the following;

Mazhar Nazir was a hard working cabbie who came to America (LEGALLY) from Pakistan 33 years ago. For the past 25 years he has been driving cabs. He was known for his generosity and kindness. His friend Altaf Anjun told the story of Nazir picking up a distraught Russian woman at 3 a.m. in Georgetown. She had lost all her documentation and had no contact information for anyone in this country. Nazir took her to his home, fed her and helped her contact the Russian Embassy later that day, Anjun said. Sadly, his last act on earth was one of just trying to help out a fellow American.

Early in the morning of November 2nd Evan D. Gargiulo hailed Nazir's cab and told him some sob-story about having his wallet, keys & cell phone stolen inside the Fur Nightclub in D.C. He persuaded Nazir to drive him home where he could get some cash. Instead, Gargiulo (a recent college grad with a good job as a Systems Engineer) grabbed his 9mm pistol, then asked Nazir to drive him to Tysons to get his car. Instead of paying Nazir, Gargiulo shot him "in self defense." Gargiulo then climbed into his SUV & drove away. No call to the police, no frantically running to a stranger's house to ask for help. Nope - just a visit to the D.C. Police the next day to report the theft of his stuff.

When the police finally connected the dots and asked Gargiulo about the incident, he claimed self defense. That Nazir had climbed over the seat and attacked him. Really? Then tell us, Mr. Gargiulo, how is it that Mr. Nazir was found dead in his cab, securely seatbelted in? Shot to death with the bullets from your gun. Leaving behind a wife and child - no, a widow & orphan.

Gargiulo had no intention of paying Nazir. It matters not if Gargiulo had devised the plot to get a free cab ride from the beginning, or when he (magically, it seems) got into his home and saw the 9mm. At some point the murder became planned - premeditated.

Cold blooded, planned murder. No remorse. No mercy. Karma's a bitch.


For the entire story, from which some of the above was lifted, please see http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/11/17/AR2008111702117.html

Let me paint the picture for you.....

Putin may return to Kremlin in 2009

Russia to deploy missiles near NATO border

Do you hear that? It's that kind of half snoring, half grumbling noise bears make when they wake up. For those of you who have not been paying attention Russia has been getting a little...aggressive. No one should have a problem with how the Georgia events unfolded. Free Georgia (or whatever they're called) fired the first shot & Putin responded as any good Russian would; "F-You! I'm a BEAR!"

Now, within 48 hours of the election of Mr. Obama, Mr. Medvedev & Mr. Putin have raised the rhetorical heat up to 11. Depending on the version of the story you read, the Soviet.....I mean Russia, has threatened to either "move missiles to the NATO Border" or "Will target NATO cities" with missiles if the Missile Shield continues to be deployed.

The USSR...dang, did it again... RUSSIA has been watching this election with great interest and the candidate they wanted to win took the office. With the bulk of US Conventional forces tied up in the Persian Wars and a President who couldn't see Russia from his front porch, Putin knows that all we can do is watch his doings with our pop-eyes popping and our drop-jaw dropping.

Our friends in Western Europe, like the French who were dancing in the streets yesterday, have the full protection of the mighty forces of the UN Military Peace Keeping Forces. Right - in Soviet France the streets dance on you. I hope that Mr. Obama has a full supply of Depends on hand for when the first Soviet brigade (screw it - I'm not pretending any more) rolls across the Ukrainian border. Of course, Putin will wait until just after Inauguration Day, which will give plenty of time for the effects of his cutting off the EU's oil supply in December to be fully felt.

Meanwhile, in a move which its timing will be PURLY coincidental, Al-Queda will attack (and perhaps take) at least one US Embassy. If they are successful they will take a page from the Jimmy Carter era & abandon the actual building, whisking the occupants off to various parts of the world. As time goes by and the hostages are not found Mr. Obama's rating will begin to drop.

The situation will continue way into the summer. Exacerbating the situation will be sky-rocketing fuel prices and an economy that continues to fail. The fact of the matter is that hot people get mad. As major cities in the eastern U.S. suffer under rolling blackouts the "underprivileged & downtrodden" will begin to get testy as they realize that their Messiah is paying more attention to the international situation and less attention to "redistributing the wealth." Rioting is not out of the realm of impossibility.

Long about November, with the Hammer and Sickle atop the Eiffel Tower, most of the hostages unaccounted for but some returned in pieces, the debt quickly approaching $1.5 Trillion and no one feeling all that "Empowered" the cries for impeachment will start.

Christmas 2009 will be a dismal time

Well, that's it then

Two years to get to this day. 40 minutes in line. 2 minutes to mark the ballot. Three minutes in line to feed it into the machine.

Done.

May God have mercy on us all.

How hard is it?

To replace the roll of paper towls over the sink? I swear, I do not want to see the inside of some of my co-workers' houses.